RETRO REVIEWS GUIDE

As a life-long connoisseur of all things gaming, The 'Tude Dude has consumed A LOT of reviews over the years some more comprehensible than others. To him, critiquing anything should be somewhat simple as viewers en masse don't typically have the patience to quantify exactly how good a particular numerical "score" is considering all of the fluid variables involved. I mean think about it... would you request your friend to grade a book you were interested in with a metric between 1-100 or would you just ask them if they liked it or not? Of course you could dive further and get specific about what exact components helped bring them to their decision but ultimately knowing their bottom line in this way creates a solid jumping off point to aiding you in formulating your very own opinion. Therefore, it's with simplicity in mind more than anything else how The 'Tude Dude structures his reviews as he acts like your best bud giving you both "superficial" scores and in-depth critical analysis as to exactly how he arrived at his finality.   

With that said, The 'Tude Dude plans on using a simple 1 out of 5 system in his game reviews which should cut down on the complexity a bit overall and keep everything easy to understand in terms of how things are "scored" (refer to the "Retro Reviews Key" tab above for more details). This criteria will be applied to individual aspects in the review judging them each by themselves on a 1-5 scale-

	"FAILED category"
	"BAD category"
	"AVERAGE category"
	"GOOD category"
	"OUTSTANDING category"

   Additionally, the title being reviewed will be put to a "coolness" test as it's analyzed by the 'Tude Meter , a beyond radical device created by The 'Tude Dude to properly scrutinize a video game's overall edginess on a scale of either low or high output-

	"Coolness NOT guaranteed"
	"Coolness GUARANTEED"

Finally, an overall judgement of the game will be applied going back to the 1-5 scale however a star rating will be applied for lasting effect-

	"TERRIBLE game"
	"BAD game"
	"AVERAGE game"
	"GOOD game"
	"GREAT game"

So without further ado, here are the main components of a game that The 'Tude Dude will focus on- 

	Does the game feel satisfying in its execution or is there something about it that doesn't feel quite right? Does it flow well or does it jump around from place to place? Is the story even worth mentioning? Graded on a 1-5 scale.
	Can you stop on that tiny little edge with precision or are the controls "walk on ice" slippery? Do you feel in perfect command of your character at all times or does the game act like it's handicapping you with an unfair disadvantage? Graded on a 1-5 scale.
	Does the game have music in it that you find yourself humming to days later or is it laughably bad? Do the sound effects add realism and nuance or noise pollution to your ears? Graded on a 1-5 scale.
	Is the game a sight to behold or does it leave a bad taste in your eyes? Is it exceptionally smooth when it's moving or is it choppy like the ocean during a storm? Is the game devoid of any visual-type bugs or should we call the exterminator immediately? Graded on a 1-5 scale.
	Is this a more bloody, gory, adult-themed title or does this game lack edge? Would this particular release appeal to someone superficially without prior knowledge of it or would it be easy to pass by for the next title? While I understand that this aspect is not exactly the easiest to explain (especially compared to the more typical "black-and-white" in-game elements), the bottom line is despite some variance quantified by the range detected within the 'Tude Meter, games/movies/music/whatever simply either have 'tude or they don't. Graded on a low/high scale.
	Conclusively, I will end my review with a "Final verdict" going back to the 1-5 scale essentially crunching all previous aspects of the game into one final judgement. Was the game fun and memorable or is this one you wish you could get your time back on? Is it worth playing in this world full of entertainment or would you have a better time at the dentist? Graded on a 1-5 scale.

Individual Category Ratings

	1/5 Broken Hand Representing the lowest achievable grade for an individual category, the "broken hand" is as physically undesirable as it is critically.
	2/5 Thumbs Down Universally acclaimed as a symbol of disapproval, the "thumbs down" remains vigilant as an instantly recognizable form of silent communication.
	3/5 Just Okay Depending on the context, "just okay" can range from relieving to insulting in a flash encapsulating the purely average expression with a coat of middling polish.
	4/5 Thumbs Up Bathed in infamy as the ultimate showcase of "at least I'm not dead" after a hard fall, the "thumbs up" requires zero brain cells to comprehend.
	5/5 Hang 10 The highest mark that can be bestowed to an individual category, the "hang 10" culminates all things radically awesome into one single gesture of excellence.

'Tude Meter Ratings

	Coolness Not Guaranteed The 'Tude Meter measures a low 'tude output putting extra emphasis on the title in question to shine in other areas beyond the superficial.
	Coolness Guaranteed The 'Tude Meter measures a high 'tude output ensuring the currently analyzed title displays the necessary requirements for instant gratification.

Final Verdict Ratings

	1 Star Terrible Game The lowest achievable score among any 'Tude Dude review, 1 star basically acknowledges the analyzed properties existence... and nothing else.
	2 Stars Bad Game A step above the basement but still not containing enough redeemability, 2 stars leaves plenty of room for improvement.
	3 Stars Average Game Similar to washing down chicken & rice with water for dinner, 3 stars will fill you up but your not exactly happier afterwards.
	4 Stars Good Game Screw mediocrity! 4 stars might not quite be up to penthouse level but your still basking in satisfactory style.
	5/5 Great Game The ultimate prestige for any aspect of entertainment brought under critical scrutiny, 5 stars equates to the highest levels of quality marking it as a "can't-miss" recommendation across the board.

Genre Emojis

	Mostly consisting of gameplay involving weapon-based attacks to overcome enemies/obstacles but can also include some platforming and puzzle-solving elements.
	Primarily made up of gameplay involving linear progression through hand-to-hand combat defeating waves of enemies and boss characters.
	Centered mainly around 2 characters attempting to completely drain each other's life meter by utilizing a plethora of physical and special attacks.
	Reserved specifically for titles requiring the use of an additional accessory beyond the standard pack-in controller such as the NES Zapper, Power Pad or Sega Menacer.
	Focused mostly on gameplay involving jumping and maneuvering your character on/around obstacles to succeed but can also include some action/adventure and puzzle-solving elements.
	Showcasing rudimentary problem-solving as the main gameplay component including logic, pattern recognition, sequencing, spatial comprehension and more.
	Made to describe any racing competition-type game typically involving land, water, air or space vehicles on closed circuit or point-to-point tracks.
	Concentrates its gameplay mainly on story immersion, character/party customization, strategy and turn-based combat but can also include some action/adventure, platform and puzzle-solving elements.
	Composed entirely of straight-line gameplay succeeding through groups of adversaries and bosses by simultaneously firing/dodging projectile attacks.
	Built around the simulation of playing/coaching physical athletic competitions including individual sports such as tennis/golf, team sports like baseball/football, track & field-type events and more.
	Incorporating mostly administrative navigation as its benchmark feature with little-to-no actual in-game interaction other than academic. Typically used in titles involving militaristic competition but can also be used to describe simulations that stick to the above formula.
	Used mainly to describe the recreation of an already existing tabletop/board game/game show in digital form but can also include educational, pinball, trivia, art and other random sub-genres that have no home in any of the fields above.

Single/Multiplayer Emojis

	Can only be played by 1 player at a time.
	Can be played by 1 or more players at a time (includes cooperative, competitive and turn-based multiplayer titles).

• 
  Mortal Kombat (Genesis vs. SNES)
• 
  NBA Jam (Genesis vs. SNES)
• 
  Paperboy (Genesis vs. NES)
• 
  Zombies Ate My Neighbors (Genesis vs. SNES)

VS. BATTLE GUIDE

"I only have 70$... should I buy Mortal Kombat for the SNES or the Sega Genesis???" This type of question used to plague those of us in the archaic pre-internet 'tude era as we relied heavily on loose-lipped rumors and magazines (even our guts sometimes) to make barely-informed expensive decisions which more often than not led to buyers remorse. Not to mention, there were TONS of games that made their way to multiple platforms leading to even more confusion specifically between the "similarly-powered" console-counterparts during the Nintendo/Sega advertising wars which created further market trust issues overall especially for yours truly. Well now, after many years of curious toil, The 'Tude Dude has been able to delve into these differences with a fine-toothed comb generally determining that most were exact copies of each other with minor alterations (sports games are a common example such as the Madden NFL series which plays similarly on both consoles) while others were completely unique from each other in design and brought brand-new adventures totally independent from their counterpart (Aladdin for the Sega Genesis and SNES comes to mind here). Of course with all that said we're left with the only question that any of us really ever cared about this whole time no matter which games your putting under the microscope (one I asked EXTENSIVELY as a kid especially in regards to the first sentence in this paragraph)... which one is better???

Well now thanks to a long-tenured wisdom acquired through decades of hardened internet referencing, video watching and game playing (not to mention some bitterness for eventually choosing Mortal Kombat for the SNES over the Genesis not knowing it was devoid of blood), The 'Tude Dude has formulated a distinctive type of review dedicated solely to the people out there who've ever felt duped by choosing the inferior release without the proper information provided (...like me). Enter the Vs. Battle review... a structured critical analysis focused solely on the differences (no matter how big or small) between each counterpart to better help determine which one really is the stronger in an all out battle to the death! The winner of a best of 3 rounds "match" will not only win bragging rights for their console but also get a chance for ultimate one-uppance by finishing their adversary off with a 'tudey fatality (...unnecessary sure but consider it an homage to the game that started all of this)! The first 2 rounds are won by directly comparing a pair of critical aspects against each other while the final round (if necessary) will focus mainly on any 'tude differences to complete the "fight". Each round will consist of the following-

The opening round will focus on any gameplay and/or control differences. If the games are copies of each other- are there any features missing in one or the other or perhaps missing levels? If they're different from each other- which one has a more satisfying execution and design? Do the controls feel clumsy in one more than the other? Does the actual design of one of the consoles controllers fit better with the game being reviewed?

Round 2 will move on to the sights and sounds of the games being analyzed. Does one game have a distinctive look or style that is more pleasing than its counterpart? Do the colors and animations look better on one game over the other? Are the sound effects and music more lively and engaging on a specific one?

(If needed) The final round will move on to the 'Tude Meter in addition to any minor differences between the 2 to determine the overall winner. Does one game have an edgier polish to it over the other? Are there perhaps more options in one version that aren't present in the other? Does it fit with its parent console better than its adversary?

After the battle is concluded, a winner screen will allow for some gloating in true fighting game-fashion before one title gets the opportunity to deliver the final blow and claim victory for their console! Now we can finally get to the bottom of the eternal question which has burned in the bosom of humanity like an everlasting phoenix... or maybe its just me - who knows!? Anyways, which console counterpart reigns supreme over the other and why?