Posted on September 22, 2018
A Retro Review – The Legend Of Zelda: A Link To The Past
Hit play above for in-game music from this title
Scroll below for review
presents a
by
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 (SNES) |
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 (Role playing) |
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 (Single-player) |
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 (Coolness not guaranteed) |
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 (Great game) |
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The first sequel in the venerable franchise to achieve unilateral popularity, The Legend Of Zelda: A Link To The Past evolved the original’s already pristine hack and slash formula to an even greater plateau utilizing the increased power of the Super Nintendo to sword-tempered perfection |
Story
On a dark and stormy night, a young boy named Link is awakened by a telepathic message from a mysterious maiden called Zelda that she has been imprisoned inside of Hyrule castle by the dark wizard Agahnim. Armed with nothing more than a lantern, the clothes on his back and a heart full of courage, Link sets off to find the troubled girl and aid her in any way he can. Little does he know, a sinister plot has been set in motion to bring about the greatest evil the land of Hyrule has ever known and now only Link can stop it.
Overview
The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past is the third installment in the Zelda franchise and a spiritual successor of sorts to the original Legend of Zelda in terms of gameplay and design. Just as before, you’ll take control of Link and set off on an adventure to find and rescue the princess Zelda who has been captured and imprisoned inside of Hyrule castle (this time by the dark wizard Agahnim). The gameplay is similar to previous installments (utilize your sword and different items to defeat enemies, explore Hyrule to progress story, conquer dungeons and bosses, etc.) however this edition adds an all-new “light-world/dark-world” system that sees Link traveling back-and-forth between mirrored but altered versions of Hyrule which changes the layout of the map and opens up new pathways to traverse.
After obtaining the legendary Master Sword, you’ll be tasked with rescuing the seven maidens (including Zelda) who have been trapped inside various dungeons within the dark world by Agahnim. As with previous entries in the series, each dungeon is filled with enemies and traps that must be navigated as well as locating the unique item found within which is needed for progression. Make your way through both versions of Hyrule and use the power of the rescued maidens to open up the pathway to the final labyrinth of the game and defeat the evil that lurks within in the last encounter to complete the game.
Cast
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6 Maidens |
 King Of Hyrule (in distress) Reduced to a skeleton once Agahnim began his assault on the Maidens, the former monarch can now only hope that “the legendary hero” will rise to restore him and his land back to its rightful glory |
 Link’s Uncle (protagonist support) The first to jump to arms after receiving Zelda’s telepathic distress call, this Wilford Brimley ringer starts the game out telling you to stay in bed which you immediately disobey proving once and for all that listening to your elders is an exercise in poor judgement |
 Sahasrahla (protagonist support) The elder of Kakariko Village and a direct descendant to the 7 wise men who were the first to seal Ganon away in the mysterious “sacred realm”, Sahasrahla (…gesundheit!) provides Link with tons of insight via telepathy which is good since no one else seems to really know what’s going on around here |
 King Zora (protagonist support) The biggest and presumably the most dangerous of all the fireball-shooting fishmen, King Zora is surprisingly docile compared to his army of acolytes especially when talking business over his glorious flippers which instantly zaps this hideous creature into a savvy salesmen who won’t take no for an answer |
 Lost Old Man (protagonist support) Encountered initially during Link’s first attempt at scaling Death Mountain, this lost old man turns out to be much more important once he relinquishes the Magic Mirror which grants a way back after taking your first steps in the dreaded Dark World |
 Ganon (???) Link’s ever-present nemesis… is his spirit dictating Agahnim’s motives or could something even more sinister be at play? |
 Armos Knights (antagonist support) Guardians of the Eastern Palace and the Pendant of Courage, these knights move in succession attacking Link in predictably formative patterns |
 The Lanmolas (antagonist support) Scourge of the Desert Palace and defender of the Pendant of Power, the Lanmolas consist of 3 huge sandworms who attack Link by burying themselves and emerging in unpredictable patterns while at the same time shooting projectiles that are difficult to avoid |
 Moldorm (antagonist support) The Tower of Hera’s head calamity, this wild-eyed silly snake bounces around like a popped balloon making it difficult for Link to stab him in his tail-tip weak spot before giving up the 3rd and final Pendant of Wisdom |
 Helmasaur King (antagonist support) The boss of the Dark Palace is the royal helmet-wearing scorpion dog known as the Helmasaur King whose face can be revealed with a few strikes from your newly found hammer |
 Arrghus (antagonist support) The eyes have it in the Swamp Palace where Arrghus, the eyeball-octopus lays waste to any would-be offenders who dare to use the power of the hookshot against it |
 Mothula (antagonist support) Combining the sophistication of Dracula with the fluttering annoyance of an average moth, Mothula makes its brood within the Skull Woods dungeon surrounded by spikes and treadmills |
 Blind The Thief (antagonist support) The former leader of a band of thieves who apparently transitioned to the Dark World violently and the patriarch of Blind’s Hideout, Blind initially tries to fool Link with some nifty cross-dressing however his secret is literally and figuratively brought to the light which kickstarts a drag-out battle… (cough). |
 Kholdstare (antagonist support) Cross your t’s and dot your eyes (…or roll them) it’s Kholdstare… a fuzzy snow/eye ball hybrid encased in a frozen shell who obviously occupies the Ice Palace since he’d melt just about anywhere else |
 Vitreous (antagonist support) Eye spy (…yikes) yet another eyeball-inspired boss character except this one’s covered in slime and protected by a platoon of smaller eyeballs making your trek through Misery Mire that much more miserable |
 Trinexx (antagonist support) Waiting for you at the inner crest of Turtle Rock, this 3-headed golem uses fire and ice along with physical attacks to create quite the maelstrom for Link to overcome |
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It’s Dangerous To Go Alone! Take This Lantern (XL section)
“Your not allowed to go outside and play with your friends… you need to play ZELDA for me
!!!” I cannot recall The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past properly without first thinking of my mom. For starters, she freakin’ LOVED this game (who doesn’t)! The colors, the music, the grand feeling of adventure, this game had it all! One little problem though… she never played a video game in her life (at that point) and had no idea how to manipulate Link into doing what she wanted. …This should be interesting.
“Go here… stab that guy… move that thing!” Clearly, she had the right idea but not enough patience to learn so she turned to her gamer son to be a conduit for her desire to see this quest through to the end. I didn’t mind… I mean it’s Zelda! Of course, I wanted to play it too so it wasn’t like it was a chore or anything. Plus, it made my mom speak in gamer talk for the first time ever which still makes me smile. We experienced The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past together from start to finish for our first ever playthrough and it still ranks as one of the happiest moments in my gaming life 
!
The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past is the 3rd installment in the beloved Zelda franchise and a role playing/action game that returns to the top-down perspective of the original title after experimenting with a side-scrolling style in The Adventure Of Link. As always, you’ll take command of the plucky young hero Link 
and dart off into the land of Hyrule to rescue your ever-distressed damsel princess Zelda 
from the forces of evil that threaten the current status quo. Is this a sequel? A prequel? Do we care? Not really it turns out as A Link to the Past marked the beginning of my confusion in the timeline of this great series and where I started focusing on one entry at a time instead of trying to tie them together (although technically I’m aware that it’s a prequel).
Basically, there’s this wizard named Agahnim 
(HUGE Elton John fan) who plans on unleashing the wildly powerful Ganon 
from his imprisonment in the dreaded “dark world”. This terrible realm was once a very different place known as the Golden Land and it was essentially an alternate reality of Hyrule where the Triforce was kept safe until Ganon stole it and shrouded it in darkness with his cruel heart (can’t ever just leave well enough alone). Apparently, this Triforce grants the wish of whoever obtains it regardless of their intentions making it the most coveted object around hence Ganon’s needless desire for it and the resulting chaos that came about once he was able to succeed in retrieving it. Afterwards, darkness spread over the former Golden Land and it took a magical seal from 7 wise sages to lock Ganon away in this realm and thus keep him and his unbridled lust for power from the reality that Link, Zelda and co. inhabit – the “light world”.
When the game begins, Link will start his quest within the light world to rescue the kidnapped Princess Zelda scampering about lush green plains and dusty deserts with no knowledge whatsoever of the prevailing inter-dimensional current that lies before him (and neither did I the first time I played to be honest). Initially, your tasked with the retrieval of 3 pendants with the ultimate goal being the acquisition of the legendary Master Sword after you’ve obtained them however all things are changed in an instant once you reach Death Mountain on the way to your 3rd one. It’s here where your introduced to the dark world for the first time – a mirrored but ominously-twisted version of the light world containing an entirely new set of dungeons and alternate pathways to explore draped in an apocalyptic coat of polish which was equally shocking and impressive! Though you only get to sample this briefly before returning to the light world showcasing your first example of how to use this new mechanic as you approach the Tower of Hera, the experience of this malevolent environment intensifies the already grand adventure that your on adding relevance to the surroundings as much as the characters that exist within them giving gamers their most interesting trip through the land of Hyrule to date.
As you proceed further, this dimension-swapping aspect becomes the central gameplay component to A Link to the Past as you flip back and forth no doubt appreciating the toxic nature of the ‘tudey dark world with every entry. What once was a bright land full of bird-singing innocence has warped into a bleak and demented world full of storms and cataclysms… ROCK ON 
!!! Seriously though, in addition to the badass tone that accompanies being in this hellish realm is the fact that your surroundings change in different areas which allows entry into previously inaccessible parts of the light world. By using the Magic Mirror 
, Link can travel back at any point while in the dark world and utilize the warping mechanic to materialize wherever you want and reach areas that seemed impossible to get to before. However access to the dark world can only be obtained by finding one of a dozen or so hidden portals located throughout Hyrule so discovering these will be vital in your quest.
Besides the unique light world/dark world gameplay, most of A Link to the Past feels comfortably similar to previous entries. Link will use his sword 
, shield 
and various items to wade his way through a litany of enemies and bosses while solving puzzles and following the story elements to uncover the next objective. The enemy rundown is the deepest yet in a Zelda game and provides plenty of challenge no matter what area your in such as the Deadrock’s 
on Death Mountain or the Geldmen 
in the Desert of Mystery just to name a few. The bosses are fun as well and provide a better challenge than the original game but they’re not as good as the side-scrolling encounters from The Adventure of Link in my opinion however the battle with Ganon in A Link to the Past is the best and most satisfying final encounter of the three games and really stamps the ending of this adventure beautifully. All in all, the gameplay is outstanding here (… 
it’s Zelda) and has only added to an already successful formula which made this one of the “must have killer apps” on the SNES.
When it comes to the controls, it’s hard to find anything that’s worthy of criticism as they handle perfectly throughout your quest in every way. Link moves as tightly as ever and responds to your commands quickly while executing stabs and using various items. Even new additions to Link’s move-set such as the sword spin or the dash feel completely natural when pulling off and compliment the already deep control scheme with even more addictive maneuvers for you to engage Ganon and his minions with. Not to mention, the combination of A Link To The Past with the dog bone-shaped SNES controller certainly felt a tad bit better and more precise than its predecessors adding even more layers of excellence akin to the flavor profile of fancy aged-wine.
The music is very respectable, even great at times (loving the sound bar at the top of the page) though I do feel that the dungeon theme here is not as good as either NES entry which is a small letdown considering you hear it quite often. The sounds are very mesmerizing and they’ll always spark familiarity with me instantly (such as the na-na-NA jingle from opening a chest or the fluttery noise when obtaining a piece of heart) to nostalgic days of playing this game with mom during my youth. One thing’s for sure, the sheer variety of musical tracks and sound effects heard throughout Link’s journey on the SNES is impressive and serves as a good example of the capabilities of Nintendo’s super-charged 16-bit heavyweight.
Graphically, A Link to the Past is gorgeously portrayed with bright colors and detailed sprites that justified the evolution of the 16-bit era. Comparing this game to its NES brethren is a great way to feature the Super Nintendo’s awesome power and a convincing argument to buy a new console. In fact, I don’t even think my mom would have played this had it not been for the highly accessible cartoon-like graphics that impressed in every corner of the map. From the dynamic and vibrant greens of the Lost Woods to the musty browns and blues found in the Swamp of Evil and everything in between, A Link to the Past is pure eye-candy during every second of gameplay and still challenges today as the best looking Zelda game of all time.
When it comes to ‘tude, this game couldn’t possibly be any more in the middle considering the alteration of a “light” and “dark” world combined with all of Zelda’s other contrasting tropes such as melee combat, Valentine’s Day looking heart containers, bombs that you can set off pretty much anywhere and of course… FAERIES 
– the instant ‘tude reducer! While I guess I could be more critical in this department overall, it’s freaking Zelda man!!! The game is near perfection and I’m not gonna harp on it too much just because winged sprinkle girls dot the playing field as far as the eye can see though the ‘Tude Meter calls it like it sees it I suppose. At least you can trap them in a bottle this time 
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What else can I really say about The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past (…let’s find out)? It has high marks in every category, it’s a total system seller and it brought innovative new gameplay mechanics that have become a part of the franchise as a whole. It even got my mom to want to play it which showcases to me more than anything the grand appeal of this game since she never really showed much interest until this appeared and changed everything. Suddenly, video games weren’t just an annoying barrage of random noises and brain-rotting visuals but a tried-and-true EXPERIENCE that could be enjoyed together with some of your closest loved ones! It’s kind of funny to me that despite the fact that the Zelda franchise is a single-player affair in terms of game design, I’ve seemed to always have my best times trudging through side-by-side with a loved one which is exactly how I would have wanted it anyways. Now that’s playing with super power!
Critical Analysis
5/5 |
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What a tremendous introduction into the 16-bit generation as The Legend Of Zelda: A Link To The Past provides both a faithful reverence to the NES titles (top-down gameplay of the original/magic bar from the second) and innovative mechanics that would become franchise staples (collecting heart pieces, keeping items in bottles, etc.) showcasing exactly how a sequel is supposed to be done! Pretty much every aspect is perfect or near-perfect and the feeling of quality permeates at all times during your bush-whacking, chicken-chucking journey through Hyrule’s 16-bit iteration. Besides A Link To The Past’s tangible qualities though, its VAST reaching power to the masses was/is beyond measure and I cannot thank it enough for being able to persuade my mom into giving gaming a chance during her “don’t-rot-your-brain-phase” which helped us bond in a special way. To this day, the very mention of A Link To The Past and we’re both instantly transported back to the times when she would point at the screen and shout out orders to me in restrained frustration since she had absolutely no controller comprehension whatsoever but a fervent and admirable desire to see the quest to the end. It’s memories like these that have seemed to correspond with my experience playing Zelda games (whether playing with friends or family) and quite frankly, I wouldn’t trade em for all the Triforce triangles in the world! Utilizing the magic mirror magnifying glass, only a few flaws are noticeable on this precious gem but they certainly do little to tarnish the shine any overall. My 2 biggest complaints center around comparisons to its predecessors, feeling a little less linear than the original (I mean you get full reign to the surrounding world but not at the beginning) and not quite as challenging as The Adventure Of Link (the blue iron knuckles OWN just about anything here). Not to mention, many of the enemies look ridiculously G-rated (cower in fear to the evil jumping sack of french fries) which does little to instill any fear in your chances at overcoming them. Overall though, there’s simply no denying the masterpiece that is A Link To The Past acting as a true cornerstone to not only the brand it’s attached to and the console it’s associated with but to video games as a whole brandishing all that’s RIGHT within the medium. Now that’s legendary! |
“Eyegore 
… more like eye-sore am I right?!”
Thanks for reading! Questions/Remarks/Suggestions?
Leave below in the comments section or…
E-Mail The ‘Tude Dude
radwriting@thetudedude.com
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-Pushing Reviews to the EDGE!
Published by 
Posted on September 11, 2018
Welcome To The Gold Mine – A Retrospective Of My Fondest Memories In Arcade Gaming
Scroll below and enjoy
presents a
Welcome To The
Gold Mine –
A Retrospective Of My
Fondest Memories
In Arcade Gaming
.25 Cents To Freedom
“Dad, can I have some quarters?” 
This was probably my most asked question as a kid after I was introduced to the Gold Mine, the wood-paneled arcade inside my towns local mall. Taking my first steps through the somewhat-misleading entrance into the barrage of fantastical arcade sights and sounds was absolutely magical as a child and couldn’t have presented itself to me in a better way. WOAH! So many games! Games of all varieties! There were stand-up cabinets 
(Final Fight), sit-down “cockpit” style games 
(After Burner), pinball machines 
(High Speed), basketball games 
, air-hockey 
and on and on and on… 
!!! Where do I begin?
My first experience in this video game wonderland came on a night where my dad took my brother and I out for a boys night. “Let’s go to the Gold Mine!” he exclaimed joyfully. “YAY!” my brother responded with excitement. “What the heck is the Gold Mine?” I asked curiously. “Oh… you’ll find out.” they both said in mischievous unison. Were we pickaxing for gold? Do I need a hardhat? I really had no idea what they were getting me into and I think that this surprising reveal into the world of arcades is a big part of why I still look back to these memories with such love.
Walking into the Gold Mine for the first time was a complete sensory overload. It was like too much awesome at once (if there really is such a thing). I had no idea where to even start but luckily my dad had more experience and was able to help guide me down the path to video game bliss. “There’s all kinds of games.” he would say. “Let’s find something that we can all play together!” Right away that sounded cool because not only were these titles blowing me away with amazing visuals, killer sounds and groundbreaking gameplay but I noticed that most all of the cabinets were designed to be multiplayer and it clicked just how cooperative this experience could be.
Leading my brother and I through the foggy light show at the entrance, my dad proceeded to take us to the change machine located in the rear part of the arcade. Wow was this place cool! I still felt like I was in a new dimension and had no idea how to comprehend this awesome foreign environment. As he exchanged crumpled dollar bills for piles of quarters, I scanned the arcade like a hawk searching for prey and that’s when I noticed a 3-player arcade game that looked like it would be perfect for us to try, Pit Fighter 
.
What an awesome premise as not only was the game 3-player simultaneous but it also had the look and feel of a seedy martial arts movie which instantly made us all like it. I was amazed by the digitized sprites right away and I loved that the 3 playable characters all had a unique move-set and style. Even though we were playing the same game, we were having completely unique experiences and I felt incredibly lucky to be playing something that looked and performed as cool as this. “Why don’t games look like this on Nintendo?” I asked. “They have to make these ones look good so that you come here and spend quarters.” my dad explained. “Man… I’m gonna have to figure out how to get a lot of quarters.” I told myself. The addiction had begun.
So many more hours and quarters were spent here after that fruitful night. Games like Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 
started to show up at the Gold Mine and I can still remember my friends and I taking down The Shredder and co. as a foursome. What a cool time as the game was very fun and also looked just like the popular cartoon that I was hooked to as a kid! Terminator 2: Judgement Day 
was great because it came with machine guns attached to the front of the cabinet instead of traditional joysticks. Who can’t comprehend shooting a gun at things and it works even better when you have the backdrop of a rad action movie such as this.
Of course, around this same time, the Gold Mine was getting inundated with people who were salivating over a new gaming treat, Street Fighter II 
. Piles of enthusiasts flocked to the tightly controlled tournament fighter and quarters now became more precious than ever. Random players could approach anyone’s game and challenge them for the right to continue on playing and the head-to-head experience with your quarter on the line made the game feel like there was more at stake then there had ever been before. It was clear that arcades were not just a place for parents to dump their kids while they shopped but a solid and visceral experience for players and a fast-rising business for owners.
The volcano of success from Street Fighter II continued as several new iterations were released due to popular demand. In fact, the first ever arcade cabinet that I remember being 50 cents was Street Fighter II: Champion Edition 
which showed to me just how confident they were in their machine by increasing the entry fee by 100%. I don’t even think anyone budged as everyone (me included) continued to pump these machines full of quarters. Even though many awesome arcade games were still yet to grace us with their presence, the era of Street Fighter II still ranks as the zenith of the arcade age and no other game has ever represented this experience better than this one in my opinion. Crowds of people would surround Street Fighter II like rowdy fans at a boxing match and the feeling of trial-by-fire that you got when an experienced player served you like a kung-fu master would drive you to get even better than before.
Another first that I experienced in the Gold Mine was the vastly popular and line-pushing Mortal Kombat 
. While Street Fighter II provided gamers with the most technically sound fighting game in the arcades, Mortal Kombat delivered a different kind of satisfaction in the genre with its inclusion of gory blood splatter during the match and death-dealing fatalities that could be performed at the conclusion if the player could execute the proper button combination within the allotted time limit. What a glorious first site it was to see the opposition brutally murdered in a video game! The first day I saw Mortal Kombat still ranks as the biggest crowd I’ve ever seen in the Gold Mine as everyone was clamoring to catch a glimpse of one the these crazy death moves! Bragging rights in gaming were evolving right before our eyes and learning these “Finish Him” maneuvers became doctrine to surviving the rough terrain of this new and more competitive arcade landscape.
Of course there were tons of classics to peruse through such as Pac-Man 
and Donkey Kong 
here which provided a simple premise but a daunting high-score challenge that many players would attempt on their trek through gaming paradise. Some classic shooters that I remember seeing for the first time at the Gold Mine were Galaga 
and Robotron 2084 
which never disappointed you with their easy-to-pick-up gameplay mechanics that could be enjoyed by anyone. Even classic racers such as Pole Position 
and Super Hang-On 
found their way here and introduced themselves to me with unique cabinet designs mixed with fun racing mechanics.
Another one of my favorite arcade introductions at the Gold Mine was the high-flying NBA Jam 
. Basically an upgraded version of another basketball arcade classic Arch Rivals 
, NBA Jam improved on its predecessor in every way by increasing the player total from 2 to 4, including the NBA license which provided real life teams and players to choose from and evolving the gameplay from a punchfest with basketball elements to a high-octane dunkathon complete with a funny and perfectly appropriate play-by-play announcer who stole the entire arcade’s airwaves with his loud cacklings of “BOOMSHAKALAKA” and “HE’S HEATING UP” after successful shots were made. By incorporating many of the same head-to-head elements that made the fighting games of this era successful, NBA Jam brought a bodaciously awesome trash talking experience that became as fun as any of the games from this heyday of arcade goodness and only got better with subsequent releases of NBA Jam: Tournament Edition 
and NBA Hangtime 
.
In addition to the litany of traditional “screened” arcade cabinets that could be found at the Gold Mine, pinball machines of all varieties made their home here as well and supplied players with a nice change-of-pace. Games such as Medieval Madness 
and Star Trek: The Next Generation 
made their debut to me here and supplied a different kind of challenge that was every bit as fun as the other arcade games around them. What is it about pinball that makes it fun anyways? I mean the premise should be somewhat monotonous in the sense that no matter what, your only controlling the two flippers at the bottom and occasionally smacking the ball back into the field of play. However, it’s extremely relaxing and mesmerizing to watch that little silver dude ping and boing its way back and forth (especially when your able to satisfyingly get that little guy into a hard-to-navigate high score area). One thing’s for sure, pinball machines are rad as hell and their inclusion at the Gold Mine was yet another catalyst for arcade love during my youth.
Even obscure games made their way to the Gold Mine and got all of the kids in my town abuzz with revolutionary gameplay mechanics that we’ve never seen before. One such title that comes to mind in this category is Time Traveler 
from Sega. “Dude… what the heck is that thing?” Seeing this unique arcade cabinet for the first time made me feel like the future had arrived. Using laserdiscs with full-motion video and a special curved mirror in front of a monitor, Time Traveler was able to create an optical illusion that “lifted” the projected characters up off of the flat surface creating a mind bending “holographic” effect that looked like something straight out of Star Wars. While the game itself turned out to be a somewhat forgettable fmv cowboy shooter with unresponsive controls, the experience of seeing this revolutionary new graphical style was completely cool and adds to the extensive pile of awesome arcade “firsts” experienced by me at the Gold Mine.
In the end, for me the Gold Mine had it all and provided my childhood with as many happy memories as there are quarters in the world. As a fan of video games since the 80’s, I feel very lucky to have been able to experience many of the highest points in gaming history right here inside these hazy wood-filled walls such as the Street Fighter II phenomenon and the rise of Mortal Kombat. Even though I played in tons of arcades since then over the years (many of them totally rad), nothing has ever compared to the plucky old Gold Mine from my childhood and it has come to define my very notion of what an arcade even is. The games and experiences I’ve already mentioned only scratch the surface of my overall memory of this awesome place and so much of my gaming love was sculpted through my time spent playing with friends and family here. From Missile Command 
to Marvel vs. Capcom 
and everything in-between, the Gold Mine was there to happily exchange my quarters for a good time and its namesake was proven true with every new trip as shiny golden treasures of many different shapes and sizes were always found within.
Thanks for reading! Questions/Remarks/Suggestions?
Leave below in the comments section or…
E-Mail The ‘Tude Dude
radwriting@thetudedude.com
Follow The ‘Tude Dude
-Pushing Reviews to the EDGE!
Published by
Posted on September 1, 2018
A Retro Review – Streets Of Rage
Hit play above for in-game music from this title
Scroll below for review
presents a
by
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 (Sega Genesis) |
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 (Beat em’ up) |
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 (Single/Multiplayer) |
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 (Coolness guaranteed) |
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(Great game) |
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Carving out its own bare knuckle-shaped niche within the beat em’ up genre, Streets Of Rage complimented the Sega Genesis as well as any other franchise on the system executing its side-scrolling fisticuffs assembly-line to a brutally refined magnificence |
Story
There was once a time when the city enjoyed “streets of happy” however all of that changed when Mr. X and his criminal syndicate took over everything by force and draped the roads in RAGE! With complete control over the local government and police force, the violent organization ruled with an iron fist and ran amok with all the freedom in the world to spread as much malice as it wanted. All hope seemed lost of ever restoring the city back to its previous state until three young police officers- Adam Hunter, Axel Stone and Blaze Fielding threw away their badges and vowed to put their lives on the line to punch and kick their way back to the more pleasant streets of yesteryear!
Overview
Streets of Rage is a 1 or 2 player simultaneous side-scrolling beat em’ up where you take control of one of the heroes of the game- Adam, Axel or Blaze and fight your way through hordes of random thugs and unique bosses across 8 stages en route to the final encounter with the leader of the crime syndicate, Mr. X. Each of the 3 playable characters has different attributes and their main attacks include punches, kicks and throws though they can also use different weapons found throughout the game (such as pipes, knives, bats and more) as well as a special bonus move that deals damage to all adversaries on the screen. Additional items that can be collected include apples & roasts which restore health, money & gold bars which give you points and police car icons which grant you an additional bonus attack.
The levels consist of varying “waves” of enemies randomly accosting the player(s) as they walk from the starting point to the end where a boss awaits to challenge you before proceeding. As you progress, these end-stage opponents gain in difficulty and defeated ones will return for revenge to try and take you down at different points throughout your journey. There are 3 unique difficulty settings that can be changed at the on-set of the game which increases adaptability to both new and experienced players. Utilize the strengths of the 3 heroes and battle your way through Mr. X’s entire criminal organization to complete the game.
Cast
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 Mr. X (main antagonist) Machine gun-toting crime boss… collector of X-Men comics |
Restoring Happiness Back To The Streets, One Thug At A Time (XL section)
“I want the ‘TUDE 
!” “You can’t handle the ‘TUDE 
!” “Seriously though… do you want to play some Streets of Rage 
?” During the ‘tude era, the beat em’ up genre was INSANELY popular! Whether killing time in the movie theater arcade waiting for your showtime or playing with your friends on home consoles, beat em’ ups provided both a quick and satisfying experience that most people could grasp within seconds of playing. Tons of great brawler franchises enjoyed success across a multitude of platforms as well and there’s no doubt that it’s somewhat hard to mess up this ready-made formula for gaming pleasure but be-that-as-it-may there’s just something special about the console-exclusive and ‘tude-filled Streets of Rage. “Now we’re playing with ‘tude baby 
!”
For starters, the title itself sounds cool as HELL! Check your training wheels at the door kiddies- this is STREETS OF RAGE! That’s right… ROADS OF ANGER so you better be prepared for aggro and a fight with every step you take down these desolate walkways of ‘tudey goodness. 1 or 2 players (multiplayer co-op… 
) choose from one of the 3 rockstar-sounding heroes – Adam Hunter 
, Axel Stone 
or Blaze Fielding 
and set off for a punch and kick adventure across 8 stages to battle back the oppressing criminal element that has plagued the city led by the vile (and lazily named) Mr. X 
.
Each character has different attributes ( i.e. Adam is strong but slow, Axel is average across-the-board and Blaze is fast but less powerful) and also a unique move-set with different combos. Finding the fighter that works best for you isn’t too big a deal since they all basically execute the same but they do feel different enough with their moves that it is fun to try them all out for varieties sake. While there is a background story to the game involving the 3 main characters basically trading in their police badges to bring some bare knuckle justice to the crime-ridden city, it really doesn’t matter at all as you take control of one of the proud-walking heroes and partake in the RAGE that has apparently engulfed the streets of your fair town. In other words, good guys use fists on bad guys… fin!
As with any brawler your goal is to simply beat the hell out of every enemy you see on the screen at a given time and continue this process while walking down the road until you reach the boss at the end of the stage and beat the hell out of them too! The enemy rundown consists of denim-jacket wearing gingers 
, martial arts wannabes 
, M. Bison cosplayers 
and more all led by a final baddie at the end of each stage (except the elevator level) such as this Johnny Rotten reject 
, Karnov’s brother
and… the Ultimate Warrior 
(“MORE LIKE STREETS OF DESTRUCITY BROTHER ARRRGGGGHHHHHHH 
!!!!!!!!!”). Defeated bosses return in later stages for revenge to try and take you down again which is kind of funny to me as if they went home and tried to strategize a plan, changed clothes and nursed their injuries back to health just to run back into the ragin’ streets for more punishment! It works though since these dopes are very redundant in their attacks and they seem more like regular enemies anyways however this monotony lessens the quality of their introductory battle which lowers the excitement for these encounters overall.
Punching is your main offensive attack on these fight-filled avenues so no matter what character your controlling be prepared to greet all opposition you see with your fists! Landing the first blow on an adversary will stun them and repeating the process will initiate your character’s combo which does more damage and brings additional ass-kicking variety. Jumping attacks can also be performed and they are quite useful for engaging large packs of enemies as well as some of the tougher bosses. In addition to your normal melee maneuvers, there’s also a special bonus move in which you call in your cop buddies for a howitzer-like blast that deals damage to all the enemies on-screen (are these bazooka’s standard police-issue?) as well as a plethora of other weapons that can be unleashed on your foes like baseball bats, knives, beer bottles and pipes. Grappling and throwing thugs presents further effective street cleaning options (so satisfying) and playing with a second player reveals a grab and kick formation for even more boot-to-face action (performed by grabbing your teammate similarly to how you would an enemy)!
While the 3 heroes are strapped up with a fairly deep move-set, most of the enemies are sparse in their attacks and usually only have one or two moves that they rely on which does tend to get stale but what would you reasonably expect from a title in the straight-forward “walk and punch” genre I suppose? The level design doesn’t deviate much in terms of gameplay but it does have appropriately seedy backdrops that add to the overall ‘tude pool and fit the games title. As with most beat em’ ups, the best experience in Streets of Rage is had when playing with friends but it’s still plenty of fun going solo as well bashing your way through the gauntlet of mohawked ruffians that infect your roadways.
One of my favorite features is when you get a chance to “fall to the dark side” and are presented with a choice by Mr. X to join his organization just before the final fight. While the decision is irrelevant in single-player (your sent back to stage 6 if you accept his offer), things become much more interesting in multiplayer as the possibility for a fight to the death between players becomes a reality if one accepts Mr. X’s offer while the other rejects it 
. There’s even a chance for a “bad guy” ending if the hero that chose to accept wins the battle between players and then takes down Mr. X by themselves afterwards… AWESOME!
Overall, what’s not to like about the gameplay especially when expectations are tempered accordingly to the genre’s typical redundancy? It’s a fun and addictive arcade-like brawler that is both simple to grasp and satisfying in its challenge with more replay value then most other games like it. While the concept of Streets of Rage is nothing new and these types of beat em’ up games can certainly become monotonous at times, the execution is so good that it will keep you bashing heads all the way to the end no matter if your hoofin’ it alone or with a buddy. Though many titles in this category are plagued with boredom issues after only a few minutes of gametime, Streets of Rage maintains a high-end fun factor throughout… a true testament to its greatness!
The controls perform excellently in Streets of Rage and respond admirably to all of your commands quite well. Hit detection is also a major thumbs up and you’ll be hard pressed to find any beat em’ up that feels any better when smacking a hoodlum with a punch square to the jaw! It is worth mentioning that I’m not a fan of how easy it is to grab each others characters in 2-player mode as most of the time your not trying to do this and it leaves you vulnerable to opponents attacks. No matter though, it’s a worthwhile nuisance since multiplayer is the preferred way to go. Translation – give each other some space and you should be fine.
The music is legendary and resonates these ragin’ streets with super deep bass beats and edgy harmonics that are very hard to get out of your head after playing. Streets of Rage just simply wouldn’t be the same without this great soundtrack paired with it as it’s instantly head-boppin’ and never lets up throughout fisticuff affair! Most of the sound effects are fine but the less said about the awful “death screams” heard from dispatched foes, the BETTER (especially the eardrum gouging female scream). I swear these screeching yelps are just as hard to get out of my head as the music is but they are pretty funny so at least they serve as unintentional humor if nothing else.
The graphical design is good (love those backgrounds… A LOT) and all of the sprites are distinctive but some of the colors are a little drab. There are times when the bland hues drape the entirety of the stage that your in creating a sense of eye-dullness which downgrades the visuals a smidge. Overall though they look fine and do what they’re supposed to do but they’re not especially memorable… UNLIKE ME 
!?
Do we even need to question the ‘tude level of Streets of Rage? I mean, its got a kick-ass cops gone rogue premise, rotten scoundrels who want to kick the crap out of you, broken bottles being used as weapons, you name it! How about allies who clear your path with giant bazookas or the dark and gritty setting that make you glad your inside your safe and cozy home? … moving on.
There’s no denying the staying power and overall quality of the great Streets of Rage. Much like a knee to the face, this game is simple, effective and full of ‘tude showcasing the highest achievable quality a home-console beat em’ up can reach! Whatever it does lack in it more than makes up for with its edgy polish and design while flanking the Genesis in its library like a member of the nWo 
proudly showing off for its console as a center-piece title. No doubt Sega hit a home run here and there’s simply no questioning this dash and bash journey down the old angry roads. Only one thing left to do now… 
!!!
Critical Analysis
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Man do I love me some Streets of Rage! It’s quite literally one of the coolest game franchises EVER anchored down by this fantastic original which deserves a playthrough from anyone that calls themselves a gamer. It’s simple to learn and consistent in design so its accessibility is top-notch for beginners while also providing an intriguing challenge for veterans on harder difficulties showcasing a broad appeal to all types of virtual maestros. While most of the greatest innovative brawler experiences were being had in the arcades during Streets Of Rage release, it was pretty righteous to see Sega buck that tradition and release this “killer app” exclusive that represented the Genesis library like a 300 lbs. bouncer ready to throw down! Further, the amazing score by Yuzo Koshiro, tight controls, co-op support and the appropriately gritty graphics accompany your journey down these streets like a black belt and a license to kill enhancing the experience past many glass-jawed pretenders! Without a doubt, the #1 complaint I have is the terribly redundant banshee-wails that pollute your ears as your dispatching Mr. X’s army of misfits sounding cheap and out-of-place when associated with all the other high-quality components of the title. Besides that, any other downfalls (like one-note enemy a.i. and issues unintentionally grabbing your co-op partner during crucial moments) fall under a much-larger umbrella that shades itself over the entire genre in the macro making it far less applicable to critical analysis in the micro unless it’s just blatantly unavoidable which isn’t the case here. No, like most beat em’ ups, it’s the job of the developers to design a superficial environment so flashy that players overlook these issues long enough to continue their way through to the end and there’s no doubt that these streets pull that off as well as anything you’ll come across in this category… without EVER having to insert 1 single quarter! Now that’s value! So don’t wait any longer – strap up with your high-tops, fingerless-gloves and ninja headbands and join me on the Streets Of Rage for one of the most ‘tude-filled, face-punching donnybrooks you’ll ever see. |
“So much trash on the shores in stage 3 it’s making me mad… BEACHES OF RAGE!!!“
Thanks for reading! Questions/Remarks/Suggestions?
Leave below in the comments section or…
E-Mail The ‘Tude Dude
radwriting@thetudedude.com
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-Pushing Reviews to the EDGE!
Published by
Posted on August 18, 2018
A Retro Review – The Legend Of Zelda
Hit play above for in-game music from this title
Scroll below for review
presents a
by
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(Single-player) |
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 (Coolness not guaranteed) |
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(Great game) |
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The unequivocal standard-bearer and pioneer of the action-rpg genre, The Legend Of Zelda will forever be my absolute favorite NES title of all time combining rewarding gameplay, memorable aesthetics and unrestrained freedom in a beautiful orchestra of virtual harmony |
Story
The land of Hyrule was a peaceful place full of old hermits and pushy merchants living in caves until the evil Prince of Darkness Ganon came along and stole the Triforce of power while also imprisoning princess Zelda. Before she was captured, Zelda had the Triforce of wisdom broken up into 8 pieces to hide them from Ganon since his power would become unimaginable if he were to obtain both. Now it’s up to Link to find the pieces that Zelda hid so that he can gain equal strength to Ganon and destroy him in order to save Hyrule and princess Zelda from a plundering reign of terror!
Overview
The Legend of Zelda is a world exploring and dungeon conquering adventure game where you take control of Link, the hero of Hyrule and search the land over for the 8 pieces of the Triforce that have been hidden away in various temples. Your main attack is your trusty sword which you’ll get after entering the first cave you see but you can also obtain various items to help you in your quest such as bombs, fire-starting magical rods, boomerangs and a bow & arrows just to name a few. The world is completely open to Link right away so feel free to explore the land at your leisure in order to discover the location of the dungeons that contain the hidden Triforce pieces.
Enemies can be found all over the world of Hyrule including heavily-armored knights, lion-headed centaurs and many more plus every dungeon includes a unique boss that must be defeated before collecting the Triforce piece that lies within. Though linearity is critical to progression, the pathway forward is not always clear and you’ll have to use your wits in order to decipher the way to find all the necessary treasures in order to save Hyrule. Discover and obtain all 8 pieces of the Triforce that have been hidden away and meet your destiny on Death Mountain to destroy Ganon, rescue princess Zelda and save the land of Hyrule once and for all!
Cast
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 Aquamentus(antagonist support) Having nothing to do with water whatsoever, this dopey unicorn-dragon spits fireballs at Link while begging to be stabbed by him directly in the snout |
 Dodongo (antagonist support) Stubborn and pressing are the best ways to describe this Triceratops-like creature who cannot be defeated traditionally but does have an appetite for bombs |
 Manhandla (antagonist support) A horrible amalgamation of botanical chaos, Manhandla attacks wildly and gains intensity with every limb lost |
 Gleeok (antagonist support) Attacking with multiple heads and an immobile body, this hydra-dragon engages with unpredictable movements, projectiles and defeated severed heads requiring Link to keep on his toes more than usual |
 Digdogger (antagonist support) Hater of sound but lover of Sauron from the Lord of the Rings series, this slow moving eyeball-sunflower is way less scary as soon as soon as Link toots on his recorder |
 Gohma (antagonist support) Hideous in every way, this spider-eyeball winks and creeps as it scutters about requiring you to deal with it like you would any giant spider in your house… shoot it with a bow and arrows! |
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Worth More Than Its Weight In Gold (XL section)
“It’s dangerous to go alone! Take this 
.” GEEZ… where do I even begin with the grandiose epic that shaped my love for video games as much as any other- The Legend of Zelda? First off… the commercials are HILARIOUS 
and totally worth a trip down memory lane (or first-time avenue if you’ve never seen any of them) by themselves as they instantly transport me back to a simpler and more shameless time. Personally, I’ll always think of that stupid Zelda rap 
EVERY time I boot this up (the creatures in the game ARE really rad)… so good! For such an epic release, it’s pretty funny to see advertisements that are THIS cheesy (the Japanese ones might be even better go check em’ out) which bears mentioning especially to the uninitiated few that look upon this great series with fervent reverence and nothing else.
That gold cartridge 
was awesome too and seeing it shine among the multitudes of grey Nintendo games was instantly tantalizing and would have motivated anyone to at least try it if they were interested in the NES even a smidgen. What a cool map and instruction booklet that came packed in as well! Its always felt like embarking on some grand journey when playing a video game that required a map and both it and the instruction manual contained so much information that was fun to learn about. Man… I haven’t even played the game yet and I already love it! What’s this? There’s a SAVE FEATURE 
!
The Legend of Zelda is a role playing game (or an action/rpg to be more specific) where you take control of the hero of Hyrule, Link 
, and travel your way across a rectangular map to discover the location of the 8 pieces of the Triforce 
in order to meet the evil Ganon 
head-on and save Princess Zelda 
! Your main attack is your sword which stabs in front of Link with a simple button press 
and also shoots a very helpful screen-traversing blast when your health is full 
. Link also carries a shield 
which can be upgraded later on to defend tougher projectiles 
at one of the many shops found around Hyrule. Balancing your approach between offense and defense with these 2 components are the main key to success overall as you romp your way about the land however many more objects become vital as the world crystalizes around you.
Along the way, you can fill up your pouch with a ton of helpful treasures such as wall-blasting bombs 
, enemy-stunning boomerangs 
, Heart Containers to raise your max health 
plus a whole lot more and the sheer variety of item complexity combined with your sword & shield is mind-blowing for a game of this generation. Some areas might require the use of an item to proceed further such as setting a bomb off to blow up a cracked wall or crossing a stream of water with the ladder 
to reach the other side while some simply give you more offensive firepower like the magical rod 
which shoots a projectile out in front of you or the bow & arrows 
which (along with the silver arrows 
) you’ll need to defeat Ganon in the final battle. If there’s an obstacle blocking Link’s path, then there’s probably an item that will help him overcome it so don’t fret too much if you get stuck since your pouch is/will be full of useful goodies!
The level design is compiled of a main overworld with nine different dungeon sections discovered in-between and right away you’ll be loving the fact that your path is not linear so feel free to roam in any direction that you like and uncover any path that you want at any time but some locations are tougher than others so beware meandering around too far without the proper equipment. Populating this robust world is a very nice collection of enemies ranging in difficulty like pieces on a chess board with tons of smaller adversaries and a nice mixture of bosses. Regular foes like Octorok’s 
, Stalfos’ 
, Tektite’s 
and Gibdo’s 
present a modest challenge and keep Link occupied throughout a majority of the game but it’s the many tougher enemies like Wizzrobe’s 
, Lynel’s 
, Like-Like’s 
(… I don’t like em’) and Darknut’s 
who give me the most satisfaction when they’re defeated.
The dungeons are non-linear as well which is great and once you’ve made your way through one of these labyrinth like stages (after finding the special item hidden inside each one of course) you’ll encounter a room with a sequential roar letting you know that you are one screen away from the boss of the level. Unfortunately, even though there’s a pretty good variety of bosses (like Aquamentus 
, Digdogger 
and Gohma 
) I don’t find their challenge to be as satisfying as some of those enemies that I mentioned before which is a little bit of a letdown. Even the final battle with Ganon is underwhelming in my opinion but this critique turns to vapor pretty quickly when I begin stacking up all of the pros to the minuscule cons.
The gameplay of The Legend of Zelda is absolutely incredible and will forever remain a blast! Perhaps the most free-feeling experience on the entire NES, The Legend of Zelda lets you go at your own pace and travel wherever you want which made it completely stand out from the restrained pack of its current-gen counterparts. No other game from this era felt or feels as grandiose as this one and the level of quality overall is unrivaled across the board. Though it does get a little confusing at times due to its cryptic nature, The Legend of Zelda never gets frustrating which is a testament to its fun factor and overall adaptability, rewarding the player for every second of time spent learning its nuances.
The controls feel perfect whenever moving Link and the overhead perspective works nicely to navigate him around many of the “screens” especially when your battling a bunch of enemies at once. It’s also very impressive that there’s as many items as there is in the game and they all execute properly and feel great to use. No matter if your dodging multiple incoming projectiles or engaging an end-level behemoth, the excellent handles never stray from your side accompanying your adventure with welcome gusto. Bottom line, the controls are as tight as anything you’ll find on the NES and really put you in complete command of Link in every way.
The sound department rates very high with memorable tunes and effects. The music ebbs and flows wonderfully when transitioning from the lighthearted overworld theme to the dark and dingy riffs inside the dungeons (sound bar at top) though you’ll be hearing these 2 songs more than any other which limits the variety a bit. The sound effects are extremely pleasing for me from the tings of hitting your sword off of a Darknut’s shield to the ominous yelps heard from a nearby stage boss and everything in-between. Shout out to that whistle jingle as well it always gets me!
Visually, The Legend of Zelda has an interesting blend of colors and sprites that ultimately work fine but some of the dungeons are strange looking (neon green walls… really?) as well as some of the enemies 
. Despite having aged some over the years, I still find this “pixely” look to be appealing overall though. There’s not a ton of detail found throughout the world which is another small gripe (kind of wish there was a town with houses instead of everyone living in caves for example) but everything with the graphics just kind of pulls together and has a charm to it that still looks good today. In the end, the best way of summing it up is simple- The Legend of Zelda might not be the prettiest thing you’ve ever seen but its graphics are more than serviceable displaying a wonderfully woven world confined by the restraints of the time which obviously couldn’t keep up with the rest of its greatness. Hmph… maybe it wasn’t quite as simple as I thought but hopefully you get the point.
Scanning The Legend of Zelda with the ‘Tude Meter results in a moderate rating as it doesn’t rely on blood or gore in any way while providing a kid-friendly story but it does have that ominous dungeon score as well as tons of gritty enemies most notably the highly intimidating Darknuts. It’s worth noting too that there’s a lot of dumb looking adversaries as well that help to reduce this rating down further than its potential would dictate like the “evil” Hershey’s Kiss-looking Gel 
for example. More than anything though, it seems impossible for the ‘Tude Meter to achieve a maximum rating on a game that contains faeries in it since they basically represent the exact opposite of what ‘tude is. No worries though since this grand adventure requires no gimmicks whatsoever to be awesome.
Quite simply, The Legend of Zelda is an absolute marvel and a bucket list must-play for anyone and everyone across the board regardless of your endearment towards the series. It has so many high points that it makes perfect sense for the cartridge to be draped in gold. The challenge is right-on, the aesthetics are top-notch and the progression feels completely rewarding the longer you play justifying its addictive quality as much or so than any other title from this generation. Bottom line, don’t go it alone (it IS dangerous after all), grab your trusty sword and hastily embark on a quest to the nearest NES you can find and pop in this shiny golden treasure today!
Critical Analysis
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who laughs at your futile attempts to stab him in the face and retaliates in kind with his twin pet campfires (no I’m not making that up)! Even with this (and many more examples of attitude to be found in the game) the |
There’s simply no greater honor I can bestow onto this masterpiece other than to say that this is my favorite EVER NES game! With no time limits or predetermined paths to follow, The Legend of Zelda broke new and exciting ground in the video game world and provided gamers with an amazing introduction into the sword-slashing, treasure-finding, dungeon-plundering backdrop that would eventually become one of the most beloved franchises in the entire gaming universe. I still remember playing this with my next-door neighbor as a kid, adapting our young brains around this engrossing concept which required a much more thorough strategy than anything else that we could have imagined at the time, propelling our fun factor comprehension into the stratosphere! Further analyzation reveals a beyond-extensive list of pros for The Legend of Zelda – awesome gameplay, great controls, catchy music, interesting characters, a golden cartridge, compelling challenge that raises in tempo perfectly, multiple quests with new map layouts, etc. SHEESH, it almost seems criminal now to have charged a similar price with other titles that didn’t even deliver a fraction of what this one did. Observing the downfalls of this luminous splendor requires a microscope since they’re few and far between to say the least though I would say that The Legend Of Zelda is a bit too obscure at times when it comes to in-game direction (a common problem especially among early-release NES titles) virtually guaranteeing a spike in strategy guide sales. Beyond that, the graphics could be brought into question I suppose depending on perspective (I like them just fine but can understand if anyone else finds them too rudimentary) and most of the bosses peter out with ease after a grueling trek through the much more engaging and difficult dungeons themselves (especially Digdogger he’s a total putz) but that’s literally all these peering eyes can come up with after extensive combing. To put it bluntly – this is one of the single greatest video games you can ever play in your life… PERIOD harnessing as many positive tropes, good times and pleasant memories that can fit within one single cartridge. In other words… It’s dangerous to not play The Legend of Zelda and experience the fruitful, 8-bit, bush-burning, Triforce-gathering, overhead viewpoint of Hyrule yourself so go now and play it if for some unbeknownst reason you haven’t yet. |
“I don’t recommend pulling on these leevers 
!”
Thanks for reading! Questions/Remarks/Suggestions?
Leave below in the comments section or…
E-Mail The ‘Tude Dude
radwriting@thetudedude.com
Follow The ‘Tude Dude
-Pushing Reviews to the EDGE!
Published by
Posted on August 13, 2018
Top 10 Favorite MLB Players Of All Time
Scroll below and enjoy
presents a
Favorite
Players
Of All Time
I Don’t Care If I Never Get Back
Man, there’s just something special about baseball. The smell of freshly cut grass glistening under a bright springtime sun. The sounds of the bat echoing its familiar *THWAK* beyond the horizon. Finally learning how to catch the ball as a child after many agonizing (and painful… 
) attempts. I swear baseball has been ingrained in The ‘Tude Dude’s bones since I learned to breathe and consequentially it’s the first major sport that I ever followed since I played some organized ball as a kid and wanted to learn how to get better by observing the pros in the MLB (thanks Mom) which was my introduction to analyzing the different nuances of athletic competition.
So many awesome greats got me hooked back in the day like Bo Jackson 
, Roger Clemens 
, Frank Thomas 
, Greg Maddux 
and the “bash brothers” 
(Mark McGwire & Jose Canseco) and I would try to emulate many of the impressive attributes that I witnessed by seeing how these guys did it in the majors. Throughout the years of watching many of these baseball stars as a kid, other names started to pepper into my lexicon from the legends of the past and it was then that I began to realize the grand history of the sport as a whole. Transcendent figures such as Babe Ruth 
, Ty Cobb 
, Stan “The Man” Musial 
, Sandy Koufax 
and Willie Mays 
were all like spirits that refused to die as everyone involved in the baseball world talked about these guys (and many more) with a great passion and it motivated me to learn more about the titans of America’s Pastime. Despite not being able to witness these revolutionary players when they did it, it was like they leapt off of the pages of old books and magazines when I would listen to stories or read about them and my love for the history of baseball grew more and more as the entirety of the sport started to materialize into my understanding.
Today, many more stars continue to stoke the fire of the old game and further on the legacy of the diamond like Clayton Kershaw 
, Mike Trout 
, Jose Altuve 
, Aaron Judge 
and Bryce Harper 
and it just keeps rolling on. One thing’s for sure, baseball is full of greats both past and present and it’s become increasingly difficult to corral in my favorites as the list just continues to expand with the years rolling on so now seems like the right time for The ‘Tude Dude to break down his favorite players from the baseball universe with so many amazing legends that have already come and gone to add their name to the pantheon of this great pastime. So grab your Cracker Jacks 
, hot dogs 
and old mitt 
and join me for a comprehensive look through the pillars of baseball history as I rattle the cages of my memory bank to decide once and for all (subject to change with future players) who belongs in my favorite baseball players list 
!
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Position Key
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The following is a list of The ‘Tude Dude’s 10 favorite MLB players of all time.
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Frank Thomas, Willy Mays, Ken Griffey jr., Walker Buehler, Barry Bonds, Jackie Robinson, Lou Gehrig, Jim Edmonds, Raul Mondesi, Mike Trout, Trea Turner, Juan Gonzalez, Roberto Alomar, Ty Cobb, Greg Maddux, Andre Ethier, Kenny Lofton, Will Clark, Rickey Henderson, Kris Bryant, Ozzie Smith, Randy Johnson, Mark McGwire, Larry Walker, Ken Caminiti, Roger Clemens, Gary Sheffield, Derek Jeter, Edgar Martinez, Kenley Jansen, Paul O’Neill, Buster Posey, Mariano Rivera, Hideo Nomo, Bryce Harper, Curt Schilling, Kirk Gibson, Alex Rodriguez, Mickey Mantle, Vladimir Guerrero, Corey Seager, John Smoltz, Jim Thome, Johnny Bench, Don Mattingly, Giancarlo Stanton, Mike Schmidt, Chipper Jones, Mike Scioscia, Matt Kemp, Scott Rolen, Andrew McCutchen, Chuck Finley, Steve Garvey, Rich Hill, Adrian Beltre, Eric Gagne, Hank Aaron, Manny Machado, David Price, Stan Musial, Matt Williams, Bernie Williams, Greg Vaughn, Carlos Delgado, Jason Giambi, Evan Longoria, Johnny Damon, Albert Pujols, George Brett, Joe DiMaggio, Tom Glavine, Eric Karros, John Olerud, Shawn Green, Kevin Brown, Craig Biggio, Pete Rose, Pedro Martinez, Duke Snider, Tony Gwynn, Hyun Jin Ryu, Kirby Puckett, Miguel Cabrera, Vinny Castilla, Aaron Judge, Jeff Bagwell, Gary Sanchez, Andres Galarraga, Harmon Killebrew, Robin Yount, Tim Salmon, Roberto Clemente, Mitch Williams, Shohei Ohtani, Dave Stewart, Barry Larkin, Fred McGriff, Honus Wagner, Joey Votto, Max Scherzer, Yasiel Puig, Tim Hudson, Rafael Palmeiro, Kike Hernandez, Nomar Garciaparra, Ichiro Suzuki, Joe Morgan, Yasmani Grandal, Wade Boggs, Don Drysdale, Dennis Eckersley, Roy Halladay, Dave Winfield, Sammy Sosa, Gary Carter, Manny Ramirez, Paul Molitor, Trevor Bauer, Eddie Murray, Yogi Berra, Ernie Banks, Reggie Jackson, Warren Spahn, Brooks Robinson, John Kruk, Max Muncy, Tim Lincecum, Joe Mauer, Paul Konerko, Darryl Strawberry, Fernando Valenzuela and the relentlessly punctual Bert “Be Home” Blyleven |
.Thanks for reading! Questions/Remarks/Suggestions?
Leave below in the comments section or…
E-Mail The ‘Tude Dude
radwriting@thetudedude.com
Follow The ‘Tude Dude
-Pushing Reviews to the EDGE!
Published by
Posted on August 8, 2018
My Favorite NFL Team – The Dallas Cowboys
Scroll below and enjoy
presents a
My Favorite
NFL Team
Break Out Your Six-Shooters!
(Stands on stage… taps mic) “I AM A DALLAS COWBOYS FAN!” 
(Quickly runs off stage to avoid the angry mob’s pelting tomatoes!) Whether or not your a fan of football (or sports for that matter), chances are that the Dallas Cowboys have entered your life in one way or another. I grew up in Northern California (49ers & Raiders country) and always had a penchant for being rebellious as a kid. Most of my family members were staunch 49ers fans and boasted about their revolutionary offense while many friends of mine were Raiders fans and lamented about their “commitment to excellence“. I cared nothing for any of this as all I saw was a smorgasbord of hideous red & gold 
on the San Francisco side and ineptitude mixed with delusion on the Raiders side 
(though they did get some points from me later in life for being one of the ‘tudier franchises in the NFL 
).
One year, I remember going to my great-grandparents home where a gathering of my family had assembled to watch the 49ers play in a very important NFL playoff game. Not knowing what “playoffs” even were, I watched the game as a child and listened intently as different family members proclaimed the 49ers greatness and certainty of winning before the game had even started! “What if you guys are wrong?” I would say meekly as the time ticked down to kick off. “Oh… you’ll see” They would confidently snap back and I can still see the little ‘Tude Dude being conceived as I rebelliously decided to root against San Francisco so as to hopefully be on the winning side that none of them would be able to partake in.
Well, it turns out that the team that would be battling the 49ers that day seemed to be just as rebellious as me and a perfect opposite to San Francisco’s unappealing color scheme, the Dallas Cowboys 
. Not only was I mesmerized by their bright jerseys that were way more eye-candy like than stupid San Francisco’s but Cowboys 
freaking rule, their star logo grabbed me right away and they stomped the 49ers into the ground that day shutting my “way too cocky” family down while also earning a spot in my heart as the first ever favorite sports team I had ever subscribed to! 2 weeks later, they reached the NFL mountaintop by utterly demolishing the Buffalo Bills in Super Bowl XXVII 
and it was then that I understood that this team was special.
Troy Aikman, Emmitt Smith, Michael Irvin and later Deion Sanders all became names that I grew to love as the ‘Boys went on to win 2 additional Super Bowl’s while becoming the team of the decade. WOW… I felt extremely spoiled and lucky right off the bat for being able to partake in glory years this awesome right away in my fanhood. It seemed like during this time, a precedent was being set that the Cowboys were a “soft” team full of glitz and glamour that cared more for showboating than playing hard-nosed football but I didn’t listen to any of this as I carried on with my loyal-to-a-fault personality when it comes to picking favorite things like this.
Since this wonderful “golden age” of Cowboys football, (which fortunately for me coincided with my introduction to being a fan), things have been a lot more difficult for us Dallas loyalists 
and the separation of REAL fans and bandwagon jumpers has certainly commenced amidst this gauntlet of mediocrity that has persisted ever since. Through the Quincy Carter years 
, the playoff heartbreaks 
and the HORRIBLE refereeing 
(IT WAS A CATCH!!!), my love has maintained for this glamour franchise and it will never go away however, there have been droves of supposed Dallas fans who have silently backed away from America’s Team during these hard times to root for a new team (or don’t watch football anymore) and honestly… I get it. It’s certainly the easier road at this point to not be a Cowboys fan.
They DO look soft with their prissy white uniforms 
! Their owner is a 5 year old kid in a billionaires body controlling the team as if he were in a sandbox
! They are constantly the headline of any sports related publication EVEN WHEN THEIR IN LAST PLACE 
! I totally understand and comprehend where a lot of the hate comes from and you know what… I STILL LOVE THE DALLAS COWBOYS 
!!!
I might understand the logical reasoning behind picking the easier and less resistant path when it comes to being an NFL fan but I’ll never understand changing loyalty or being a bandwagon jumper as I felt like I made a commitment for life when I chose Dallas as a kid! Even though I’m all grown up now and can decipher and articulate so much better than I could as a child, I still love my ‘Boys and root for them with a relentless passion despite the seemingly never-ending barrage of negativity thrown their way 
. A lot of the hate that I used to hear as a child bugged me but now I feel like it’s fuel, driving all of Cowboy’s nation to what will ultimately be one of the sweetest ever days experienced when we can see that Lombardi trophy finally make its way back to Dallas and shut up some of our loudest detractors 
. Or maybe we’re completely doomed with a curse of suckage 
?
Either way, The ‘Tude Dude will be riding in the same seat on the Dallas Cowboy bus for the rest of his days thanks in large part to the many Cowboy greats that have donned the iconic star on their helmets like The Triplets 
, Jason Witten 
, Demarcus Ware 
, Deion Sanders 
, Sean Lee 
and Dak & ‘Zeke 
. We may be dressed in shiny whites for a human destruction derby and we may have an “I swear I’m a genius” (and way too involved) owner but you can rest assured that we’ll always be prepared for a gunfight with our six shooter’s in tow 
. Thank you Dallas Cowboys for providing one helluva ride over the years. Through Super Bowl glory and circus-like zaniness, you’ve stayed true to yourself and you helped plant the seed of rebelliousness inside The ‘Tude Dude’s head, bringing us here today! Once again thank you Dallas Cowboys, you will forever be my favorite NFL team.
Thanks for reading! Questions/Remarks/Suggestions?
Leave below in the comments section or…
E-Mail The ‘Tude Dude
radwriting@thetudedude.com
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-Pushing Reviews to the EDGE!
Published by
Posted on August 2, 2018
Vs. Battle – NBA Jam
Scroll below and enjoy
presents a
by
&
| (Sega Genesis) |
(SNES) |
| Genre |
|
| Players | (Single/Multiplayer) |
Tale Of The Tapes
NBA Jam is a 2 on 2 slam dunk centered basketball game which started its life in the arcade’s before making its way to home consoles. It has a similar playstyle and feel to another arcade basketball classic, Arch Rivals, however it improved the gameplay with the NBA license, shoes that go turbo and the ability to fly higher than humanly possible and mega dunk with authority! Each game consists of (default) 2 minute quarters with the obvious goal of outscoring your opponent through any offensive means possible however, slamming the ball through the hoop like a meteor after flipping in the air a hundred times looks way more stylish than anything else (even if it is still only worth 2 points just like a plain old jump shot).
The console versions use rosters from the 1993-94 NBA season and all of the 27 teams in the game are represented by 2 of their best players such as John Stockton & Karl Malone on the Utah Jazz or Patrick Ewing & John Starks on the New York Knicks. With a fun trash talking announcer and up to 4-player support, NBA Jam is considered the godfather of arcade sports games and an absolute blast to play! Though released on a multitude of different platforms, we’re gonna take a look at the Genesis version and the SNES version and see who wins in a game of one-on-one. Now let’s tip-off and start the battle!
The Battle
The rosters and modes are completely identical in both versions so we’ll have to compare the controls in this round to determine a winner. The general handles for both games feel good as the players move and respond nicely and the only differences that are found are in the controller’s themselves and how their buttons layout in relation to the game. It’s a really close call here since I like how the Genesis controller’s face buttons feel closer to the arcade experience but I have to give the slightest of edges to the SNES version since the shoulder buttons function perfectly to hold down for turbo freeing your face buttons (and your thumb) to focus solely on shooting and passing.
Round 1 Analysis
| Gameplay | PUSH |
| Controls | |
Round 1 winner
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An easy win for the SNES version in the sight and sound department as it tops the Genesis in every way. The colors and sprites are brighter on the Super Nintendo while the music and voice samples sound distinctively crisper and more accurate to its arcade big bro’. It’s interesting that the SNES version doesn’t have music in-game while the Genesis version does, but it’s not nearly enough and only serves to get the Genesis version a jab or two in on an otherwise dominant round from the house that Mario built.
Round 2 Analysis
| Music/Sound | |
| Graphics | |
Round 2 winner-
|
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Overall winner
|
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Thanks for reading! Questions/Remarks/Suggestions?
Leave below in the comments section or…
E-Mail The ‘Tude Dude
radwriting@thetudedude.com
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-Pushing Reviews to the EDGE!
Published by
Posted on July 29, 2018
A Retro Review – F-Zero
Hit play above for in-game music from this title
Scroll below for review
presents a
by
|
(SNES) |
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 (Racing) |
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(Single-player) |
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 (Coolness guaranteed) |
|
(Great game) |
|
*LOVE that soundtrack *Controls respond with pinpoint precision *Speed, speed and more speed |
|
*Would have been incredible with 2 player split-screen *Collision detection is too sensitive *A little lacking in depth |
|
Bucking Nintendo’s typical first-party approach of safety nets and training wheels, F-Zero zooms past the competition in record time displaying some the best chops in the racing genre bar none no matter the system or console |
Story
The year is 2560 and racing has evolved from boring cars that touch the road to hovercrafts that float inches off of the ground and rocket up to speeds around 300 mph. The top 4 racers in F-Zero – Captain Falcon, Dr. Stuart, Pico and Samurai Goroh are all vying for the glory of winning the F-Zero Grand Prix. Fame and riches await the champion but who can survive the hazards while also keeping the pedal to the floor?
Overview
F-Zero is a high-speed racing game where you control a futuristic hovercraft and navigate closed-circuit courses whilst avoiding other racers and random hazards from starting point to finish line. 2 different game modes include “Grand Prix” which features 3 unique leagues and 5 races/tracks in each against a.i. opponents as well as “Practice” which allows you to race on individual tracks with either 1 or no other opponent present. Blast through 5 laps on each track as fast as possible and avoid finishing beyond the podium to proceed to the next race in Grand Prix mode. Along the way, all of your best times are saved so that you can always go back and attempt to set a new mark on each track.
There are 4 crafts to choose from – The Blue Falcon (good for beginners), The Golden Fox (great acceleration but flimsy structure), The Wild Goose (can take a beating but horrible off the line) and The Fire Stingray (fastest top speed but supremely heavy) all offering a unique playstyle and feel with which to appropriate to players of all varieties. After each lap, a boost is rewarded to your pilot which can be stored and used at any time but beware the many different hazards that litter the 15 different courses such as landmines, ice and jumps that can send you flying off the track. Discover the best line and straddle the delicate balance of risk/reward to conquer each track and become the ultimate F-Zero champion!
Cast
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Blast Processing Huh? (XL section)
“Dude, I think I’m going WAY too fast 
!!!” Man… if this is the future that’s in store for us in the 26th century then maybe I really do need to look into that cryo freezing thing…
… YIKES maybe not! I can still remember looking ahead as a child in the 80’s and 90’s. *The Year 2000* It sounded so magical as if somehow all of our sci-fi movie dreams were going to come true as soon as the clock struck midnight to start the new millennium. Flying cars and interstellar travel 
? NO PROBLEM… it’s the year 2000!
Unfortunately, none of the amazing things that the movies promised us became real and it turned out to be just another dumb trip around the Sun without the ability to teleport or time travel… OH WELL 
. Despite the year 2000 not living up to all of its sci-fi potential, games like F-Zero give me hope at least for future generations that maybe we just might reach that cool Star Wars like reality someday. At least they were smart to set their time period much later so no one has to be disappointed if it doesn’t come to fruition in their lifetimes (though there better be flying cars by the 2500’s or my soul will STILL find a way to be disappointed).
F-Zero is a high-octane balls-to-the-walls racing game where traditional automobiles have been replaced with super high velocity jet-powered hovercrafts dueling each other at breakneck speeds on 15 different tracks across 3 different leagues. There are 2 different race modes to choose from- Grand Prix and Practice. In Grand Prix, you’ll first pick from one of the 4 available racers as well as select your opponents difficulty level from 3 different settings (beginner, standard and expert) before swapping paint with the other 3 crafts (along with a glut of cpu-controlled generic vehicles) as you make your way through each league with 5 races apiece. The goal in this mode is to maintain a top-3 finish in each stage so that you can advance to the next track until eventually reaching the end but beware falling too far out of a place let alone all of the regular dangers that come with throttling around these twitchy futuristic courses at crazy speeds. In Practice, you’ll choose your craft, select if you want to compete against 1 other computer-controlled opponent or not and race on each track individually which is the preferred mode for setting record times.
The 4 different racers are eccentric and interesting and they all offer a contrasting feel and unique stats allowing for more forms of accessibility. Captain Falcon 
, the star of the game, is an authoritative bounty hunter who pilots the average-across-the-board Blue Falcon 
. Dr. Stewart 
is a suave and arrogant M.D. (hope he’s not on call) who pilots the super fast accelerating/weak body structure Golden Fox 
. Pico 
is a dangerous and cold hearted hit-man who pilots the nearly indestructible/slow accelerating Wild Goose 
. Samurai Goroh 
is a cunning and lawless pirate who pilots the high end top-speed/super-heavy Fire Stingray 
.
Finding the racer that feels best for you is paramount to helping you succeed to get those better track records (Fire Stingray’s my guy) so the more time spent appropriating yourself to the 4 pilots the better. Each vehicle certainly feels dramatically different which provides a nice range of options right off of the bat. Unfortunately, there are only 2 different modes which feels a little sparse and the lack of split-screen support definitely hurts but what is here does feel satisfying enough especially if you consider the games release date (1991 in the U.S.). The ability to save your best times (for example) adds a ton of replay value and allows for a sort-of 2 player mode as the controller is passed back-and-forth to try and break current track records which is a nice consolation.
The course variety is good and each new race brings a complex challenge such as jumping the track in White Land II or navigating the crazy “screen push” in either Death Wind stage just to name a few. Most of the hazards are tricky and annoying (god I hate that magnet bar thingy 
) but by far the most scream-inducing frustration is the pinball-like hit detection when you slam into another racer. No matter where I collide with another craft, I get sent into an unpredictable tailspin that usually results in my craft smacking into the electric barrier several times. It’s for this reason that I stick to the “Practice” mode when I’m trying to set new track records as you can choose to race against one other rival, or no one at all, while also learning the layouts of the different courses at a more reasonable pace.
The controls are excellent in F-Zero and everything feels proper and smooth which is nice considering your ridiculous speed at all times. This is the kind of game control-wise that I LOVE as you (the player) gain experience with every second that your playing it rewarding long-term enthusiasts. Mastering the shoulder buttons to make those sharp turns, knowing the right place on the track to use your boosts and learning when to throttle/brake are all examples of how you can shave seconds on your time and each craft has distinctive handling which showcase the uniqueness of the great controls found here.
The music in F-Zero RULES (I’m rocking out to the Big Blue theme you can find at the top of the page right now 
) and it perfectly accompanies the supersonic speed of the game with its fast tempo style and pulse thumping beats. There doubly impressive to me to because they sound way ahead of their time which fits the futuristic concept like a glove. Even though some of the sound effects aren’t the most memorable things I’ve ever heard, that explosion sure sounds tight when your vehicle blows up so thumbs up there 
! Did I mention the music rules? …Oh I did, well it deserves mentioning again because it really does! You’ll be hard pressed to find anything cooler and more ‘tude-filled in this entire era.
The graphics were freaking awesome looking when the game was released and showcased the power of the Super Nintendo’s Mode 7 visual style quite well. Despite some “fuzziness” at times, I still find them appealing today as the 4 main crafts all look distinguishable while the different levels all contain a cool color design and trippy background. Seriously though, what the heck are those crazy structures back there in Port Town, clam shell condominiums 
? Most of the surrounding backdrops contain some kind of strange but interesting object like this and it adds depth to the visuals though it is harder to appreciate (and not recommended) when your zipping around hairpins trying not to die.
The ‘Tude Meter pulses with delight as it scans this super rad, certain-death, hyper-speed, holy #%@&, racing game which is a welcome change from Nintendo’s typical first-party mantra. I guess maybe it would be even more ‘tudey if you could shoot missiles or whatever at each other during the race but to hell with that man… here in the F-Zero world, we live our life one quarter-mile at a time 
(or 5 laps at a time… whichever)! In other words, speed KILLS dude and it’s just as badass as blowing people up according to the laws of coolness though the game still provides explosions and death just to ensure its place among the edgy elite!
I can’t contain myself… I LOVE F-ZERO! This game feels like wearing a tailored suit that’s just for me. It has just about everything I could ever ask for in a racing game – tight and responsive controls, killer music, a nice variety of crafts & tracks and a super cool futuristic premise that sated my youthful thirst for brand new ideas set in a far distant time period. No doubt about it, F-Zero is one-of-a-kind and supplies extreme racing fun around every twist and turn. Maybe this is SNES Blast Processing!?
Critical Analysis
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4/5 |
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5/5 |
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5/5 |
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4/5 |
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!!!|
Dude, what else can I really say other than F-Zero has and will forever be my absolute favorite racing series to date! I mean, you zip blitzing future cars across a multitude of vibrantly trippy-looking planets with excellently responsive controls all while a rip-roaring soundtrack pulses in the background to a rhythmic cadence that corrals your focus into a Zen-like engine of unrelenting mayhem! It reminds me more of racing jets in a way, other than cars, which raises this game’s uniqueness from other driving titles of this era foregoing much of the slippery stubbornness that associates itself with those pesky rubber wheels and putting straight-line speed to the top of the priority list where it belongs. …And from Nintendo no less – the sticklers for 10 and 2 driving?! Yeah Sega, how’s that “we’re SO much faster than you are” propaganda working out for you again??? There are a few gripes that are inescapable such as the lack of 2 player support, bad hit-detection and a not-so deep Grand Prix but these complaints fade away into the background quickly when you’re having too much fun narrowly escaping death at rapid speeds either by yourself or against the computer. As far as F-Zero is concerned, the greatest competition comes from within anyways constantly tantalizing players to set a new bar of excellence on a difficult track for pride and gloating purposes. It’s these types of releases that grind gamers into twitchy cyborgs, increasing hand-eye coordination and reflex awareness beyond the status quo synthesizing our collective mindset towards a heightened sense of consciousness and I’m ALL for it (the path to enlightenment starts with a single boost in this universe)! Best way to sum it up – There are many fun racing games in this generation (and beyond) but none of them feel like F-Zero and I simply can’t recommend it enough. With as much genuine endorsement as I could possibly muster, strap yourself into the cockpit of one of these hovercrafts as soon as humanly possible if you haven’t yet and prepare yourself for a breakneck, city-jumping, turbo-boosting adventure unlike any other! |
“Man, those Death Wind levels really BLOW!“
Thanks for reading! Questions/Remarks/Suggestions?
Leave below in the comments section or…
E-Mail The ‘Tude Dude
radwriting@thetudedude.com
Follow The ‘Tude Dude
-Pushing Reviews to the EDGE!
Published by
Posted on July 27, 2018
Top 10 Favorite NBA Players Of All Time
Scroll below and enjoy
presents a
Favorite
Players
Of All Time
I Love This Game
“NBA action… it’s FANTASTIC 
!” Man do I love the NBA and its unique cast of characters! Whether doing ridiculous between-the-legs slam dunks (a la Vince Carter 
) or trash talking loud enough to get their opponents completely rattled (Draymond Green anyone 
?), NBA stars are always doing something entertaining and The ‘Tude Dude simply can’t get enough of these b-ball savants.
The debates rage on amidst NBA fans and journalists about who the greatest of all time is (
) but I find these discussions to be somewhat frustrating because they’re still based on opinions no matter how many facts you use to support your argument. For instance – Michael Jordan has an unblemished NBA Finals record (6-0) but he retired 3 different times in his career which affected his overall numbers and longevity. Despite some inconsistency in terms of years played, it’s extremely difficult to lob any kind of negativity towards MJ especially if you watched him play. The dude was over-the-top AMAZING! He commanded respect from the highest order and his work ethic and will-to-win were second to none.
Meanwhile, LeBron James has a losing NBA Finals record (4-6 so far) but has played in an amazing 8 consecutive championships while carrying some pretty below-average teams at times. He faces more scrutiny from fans and the media than any other athlete probably in the history of sport. But season-in and season-out, King James brings it to the max and has continued to impress me with his genius basketball intellect combined with his Terminator-like body structure.
To call either of these players the “g.o.a.t.” would garner absolutely zero argument from me as I can jump on board either campaign float. I’m a huge fan of Jordan’s mental toughness and killer instinct and there was just something magical about watching him play 
. Also, I have been completely floored by the real-life NBA Jam man LeBron James. He exceeds at everything individually but it’s his willingness to always put his teammates first that has really made him extra great. Plus… he won a freaking title for curse city Cleveland 
!
Does it really matter anyways who was technically better or not? I truly don’t think so. Both players are champions, MVP’s and total trend setters in their respective era. You could scream at me about Jordan’s perfect Finals record but I would counter you with the fact that basketball is a team sport and MJ enjoyed the luxury of one of the greatest coaches in NBA history 
(Phil Jackson) as well as one of the greatest wing-men of all time 
(Scottie Pippen). You could badger me about how LeBron has had to play much tougher opponents during his career such as 
Golden State and 
San Antonio but I would once again rebut by saying that Jordan had to persevere in an era of mega hard fouls and ruthless defensive stops.
In other words, I see MAXIMUM greatness in both players but I’m sure many people see it another way. Some debate that stats and numbers are the most black and white way of determining greatness while others would say that one player passed the “eye-test” more than the other. No ones opinion is wrong either way therefore debating and listing the greatest ever NBA players is something that I would rather leave to those that are willing to dive into the cesspool of logistical and analytical expertise. Instead, it will be much more personally gratifying for me to list my favorite players of all time as I can avoid the arduous task of number-crunching and career comparisons and just stick to the guys that made the most impact on my fanhood. So put on your Reebok Pumps 
, headband 
and Horace Grant goggles 
and let’s fast-break it all the way to the rack for a sweet alley-oop 
!
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Position Key
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The following is a list of The ‘Tude Dude’s 10 favorite NBA players of all time.
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…easily a top 5 personal fandom moment for me! I can’t thank you enough for all of the clutch plays and winning attitude that your career has brought me and all of Laker nation and I will ALWAYS be a Kobe Bryant guy! R.I.P. Kobe Bryant (1-26-20) – taken from us WAY too soon but NEVER forgotten.|
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, movies 
and of course… video games 
(at least Laimbeer’s not the only one) putting him front-and-center in any household’s cone of attention (especially mine). Later, his career would be defined by much more than his marquee value as his gluttonous pursuit of championships attested to his overall drive to be the “deadliest predator in the jungle” showcasing a grandiose and complex personality that was somehow even larger than his titanic frame. As a Lakers fan, I’ll never forget the day I came home and turned on SportsCenter to the greatest sports-related news of my young life – NBA free agent Shaquille O’Neal signs a 7-year contract with the Los Angeles Lakers. AHHHHHHHH!!! What proceeded afterwards still ranks as my golden-age years of fanhood inciting both hope and satisfaction simultaneously as a young 
(the Lakers first championship since 1988 and also the first of 3 in a row)! It’s truly thanks to these memories that I feel a broader connection with the franchise I’ve always loved so much as Shaq and Kobe represented “my generation” of Lakers, inspiring me to garner everything about the team’s past while at the same time celebrate the present with a fervent and seemingly inherited pride while I was in my youth! To this day, I still gush to anyone who will listen about my photographic recollection of this absolutely perfect recipe of appropriate superstar athlete mixed with the ultimate star cluster franchise resulting in the most delicious sports dish I’ve EVER consumed! Thank you Shaq for every single memory (…well except for Shaq Fu) that you have provided over the years, you will |
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.Thanks for reading! Questions/Remarks/Suggestions?
Leave below in the comments section or…
E-Mail The ‘Tude Dude
radwriting@thetudedude.com
Follow The ‘Tude Dude
-Pushing Reviews to the EDGE!
Published by
Posted on July 22, 2018
A Retro Review – Jerry Glanville’s Pigskin Footbrawl
Hit play above for in-game music from this title
Scroll below for review
presents a
by
|
(Sega Genesis) |
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 (Sports) |
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(Single/Multiplayer) |
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 (Coolness guaranteed) |
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 (Good game) |
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A fun multiplayer experience and simplistic premise save Jerry Glanville’s Pigskin Footbrawl from the guillotine of criticism overall though it could (and probably should) be even better than it is |
Story
Jerry Glanville has had it with all the pleasantries of normal football and decided that now is the time to slap his name (for absolutely no discernible reason whatsoever) on top of the medieval, arcade style Pigskin Footbrawl for its Genesis exclusive release. As the knight of your team, it’s your job to make Jerry proud by punching, stabbing and scoring touchdowns to lead your squad to victory! Seriously though… who the hell is Jerry Glanville anyways and why does he wear cowboy outfits in the game when it’s set in 621 A.D.?
Overview
Jerry Glanville’s Pigskin Footbrawl is a side-scrolling action “football” game where your objective is to outscore your opponent with touchdowns which can be done by navigating your player (or assisting a cpu controlled teammate) all the way to either the right or left side of the screen. While this may sound somewhat similar to regular football (or rugby), this convention is thrown on its head as players can punch and dogpile the opposing team with no remorse, all amongst a medieval backdrop no less! In addition to the opposing team’s snarling defenders, the play field is littered with obstacles which makes reaching the end zone that much more difficult.
Pigskin Footbrawl begins with both sides vying for possession of the ball by any means necessary. Once achieved (by either you or a cpu controlled teammate), several offensive options become available such as passing the ball forward to a teammate, kicking the ball downfield, etc. with the intention of scoring as many touchdowns as possible while of course, defending your goal from the opposing team. Be forewarned though, score too often and take a large enough lead and the medieval mob partaking in this “sporting” event will call for a troll to join the losing side which will greatly increase that teams chances since they are faster and stronger than normal competitors. Do your best to survive the mayhem of this renaissance rumble and outscore either the cpu or a friend to claim victory for your team.
Cast
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All Right Guys Let’s Punch Everyone In The Face On 1… Ready Break! (XL section)
“No rules, no punts or penalties. It’s football with an attitude… a bad attitude.” 
I must confess… I have no clue who Jerry Glanville even is or why I should care about his endorsement in this game but The ‘Tude Dude is all about bad attitudes so let’s slap on a cowboy hat, get in our race car and… err play some football 
? “Tired of playing excitin’ NFL games like Madden or NFL Blitz (no… not at all actually)? WELL GOOD!!! 
Get ready for a medieval hootenanny disguised as a sport. They ain’t no better vidier game this side of the Mason Dixon y’all. You can keep yer’ sissified football games with RULES and BOUNDARIES… this is PIGSKIN FOOTBRAWL 
!!!”
I still am somewhat mystified by the inclusion of Jerry Glanville in the Genesis port of the fun arcade classic Pigskin 621 A.D 
as he just shows up in still images throughout the game. Worse still, he literally does nothing in those images and has pretty much no bearing in the game whatsoever other than his dumb cowboy likeness. On that note, can he time travel? This game is set in the medieval period! Whatever… we’ll just go with it since it seemed that so many sports titles in this era just had to have some kind of celebrity (cough) attachment.
Jerry Glanville’s Pigskin Footbrawl is a simple arcade style sports game in the mold of Arch Rivals, where engaging your opponents in hand-to-hand combat is just as important as scoring touchdowns. Punch your enemies square in the face, throw long bombs down the field, recover fumbles from opponents as they trip over tree branches and more in this medieval mosh-pit disguised as a sort-of football game. There are no season modes or anything of the sort, so only single games at a time are played which is a little disappointing right off the bat if your playing alone but can be a perfect slap-in title for a quick and satisfying multiplayer affair.
There are different options to manipulate (such as period time, game speed, etc.) which can all be interesting to tweak for unique experiences I suppose but nothing too compelling. …That is until you take a peek at your controls? There’s an “attitude” button 
? I was giddy when I discovered that pressing “a” on the controller would engage attitude! However, I was disappointed to find that this just changed your team’s play style which unfortunately doesn’t amount to anything at all 
. Different attitude options include “scatter”, “get ball” and “man-to-man” and this seems like it would add a nice element of strategy to the slobber-knocker taking place on the field but I swear none of these play out much different to me so this whole aspect feels like a lost cause.
Basically, the game starts with one team kicking the ball into the field of play and then it’s all out WAR! You control the knight of your team (who along with the opposing teams knight seems to be the fastest guy on the field) as you do your best to recover the ball and push it to whichever end zone that your team is trying to reach. The gameplay feels like a sort of tug-of-war as both teams vie for the same goal in opposite directions. The screen scrolls back in forth in relation to wherever the ball is so your player (as well as many of the cpu controlled competitors) can find themselves outside of view at times but an arrow always indicates where your at so you usually have a general idea where to run to get back into the action.
You can signal for your cpu controlled teammates to pass the ball to you by pressing “c” when they have possession and you can also perform different passes when you have the ball by holding down the “c” button until an action prompt shows up on the screen and when you release the button the displayed maneuver will be performed. While this does take some time to get accustomed to, it ultimately works okay and allows for several different options (other than just running) to advance the ball down the field closer to your end zone. You can also perform a dropkick (… I thought you said there was no punts JERRY 
) which kicks the ball pretty far down one side of the field creating a “live-ball” situation that can many times prove useful. Pressing “b” punches and you might as well spam it over and over again during the game as it not only melee’s for your character but for your teammates as well, increasing your chances at jarring the ball loose from the current ball-carrier.
Blocking your path to the end zone (besides the opposing team) is a ton of obstacles such as trees, puddles and rocks, all of which will stop your character and allow for the opponents to catch up. The players can tackle each other as well and the game will go through a Looney Tunes sequence 
where they dogpile into a cloud of smoke with one player emerging from the pile to get first chance at possession. Random weapons also litter the field which aid you in these sequences if you have one in your possession when touching your character with an opposing teams player so don’t be afraid to fight dirty whenever you get the chance!
You can only score by having you or a member of your team reach the end zone (no field goals or safeties) so get there early and often to stay in the lead. If one team gets too far ahead, then the game will automatically assign the struggling squad a “troll” 
who will not only be an extra player for them but is faster as well and will help turn the tide for the losing side in order to keep things competitive. Even adding one of these dudes is enough to drastically change the fortunes of your current game but it is possible to see more (on either team) if Pigskin Footbrawl feels it’s required – like a self-aware equalizer! At halftime, Jerry himself 
shows up (in appropriate medieval bull-roping attire no less) to display your many great Footbrawl achievements such as hangings, spearings and… Elvis sightings 
(…still looking for my 1st one)???
The controls aren’t bad by any means but they do feel a little stiff and momentum-based as you drift your character back and forth on the screen which can make it more of a struggle to determine where you want to go. While the in-game arrow that indicates where your character is at is helpful, I find myself seeing it more often than I want to since I run too far off of the screen with ease while holding down the d-pad trying to reach the ball. Still, there’s something about the feel of the momentum that is rewarding when you are able to safely navigate a long-play into your teams score area especially in multiplayer. All in all despite some flaws, the controls work just fine and contribute to the simplicity of the games overall arcade-like nature.
The sound effects and voices in the game are clear and impressive but the music makes me wish that Jerry Glanville sung his own soundtrack as it’s boring and redundant. It sucks too because there’s plenty of opportunity for an awesome and twangy soundtrack to pair itself nicely with this slugfest but unfortunately it never happens which damages the games quality. The graphics are okay and they translate well from the arcade version but they’re not overly memorable which is all I can really say about them. Could we get just one more field to play on so variety was added to the in-game visuals or perhaps some more comedic cut-scenes?
Of course there’s ‘tude in here- just look at the cool spiked wrist gauntlets at the title screen and on the box art! There’s also an attitude button which even though it doesn’t do exactly what I want it to (I was hoping it would pull out a huge mug of ale and chug it or something like that) I give them an A for making the game scream “let’s kick some butt” when you switch to “bad attitude” (the only play style I live by)! Plenty of other examples as well contribute to The ‘Tude Meter’s spike into the maximum column including repeated punches in the face to opponents being used as a sound strategy (…badass) and the implication that a grisly visit from the executioner awaits the losers of this “sporting event” (“My name is Gladiator 
“)! Quite frankly, this is one of Sega’s perfect eyebrow raising titles in this category constantly tantalizing with the promise of an awesome and unique football fight that you just can’t experience anywhere else. Now that’s what ‘tude’s all about!
In the end, Pigskin Footbrawl is a pretty good arcade port that finds its best value playing with friends since it’s sparse in modes that make it enticing for one player. Its singular focus can be lacking in depth but what it does do it does well (particularly multiplayer) and it will always be a decent game to come back to if you like your touchdowns mixed with spikes in the face! While there are several improvements that could have been made to make it better (cooler music, increased gameplay options, a celebrity representative that makes sense, etc.), Jerry Glanville’s Pigskin Footbrawl plays well enough to be a satisfying romp in short bursts but lacks the overall polish for long play-sessions. So for the best results, grab a bud and a viking helmet and duke it out on the gridiron of Footbrawl today for a quick game or two… but don’t hold your breath on trying to spot the King.
Critical Analysis
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4/5 |
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4/5 |
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3/5 |
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3/5 |
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Move over John Madd… actually no there’s only room enough for one long forgotten coach’s franchise on this shelf… sorry. Despite a shallow offering of gameplay modes and blatant lack of at-least-decent-music, Jerry Glanville’s Pigskin Footbrawl gets a better-than-expected rating for being a fun and accessible multiplayer title that works well with gamers of any skill level. It’s a little odd in design (like Pong mixed with face punches) but it fits perfectly with the gore-filled and mega ‘tudey games in the Sega Genesis library while standing out as yet another quality arcade conversion found on the system. I love the humor in the world of Footbrawl as well as it helps to breathe life into what would be an otherwise redundant execution overall. There’s no denying that this football/fightfest is far from greatness with its lack of robust single-player offerings but it does stand out as being completely unique while offering an accessible and instantly gratifying arcade sports experience that fits the Genesis nicely. Besides that, my biggest complaint without a doubt is the inclusion of “thanks for the free check” mascot Jerry Glanville who was given WAY more life in this review than anything that happens in the game. I mean, if Sega EVER feels the need to shamelessly include an unnecessary spokesman for one of their sports title’s, how about ‘Tude League Football (what dreams may come) or ‘Tude Dude’s Pigskin Footbrawl 2: The Quest For Free Money. …Well, it was worth a shot at least. Anyways, the next time your itchin’ for some arcade-style football with a ‘tudey twist, slam in Jerry Glanville’s Pigskin Footbrawl and do the ole’ coach a solid by not only defeating your opponent… but keeping your eyes peeled for that ever illusive Elvis Presley (SERIOUSLY where is this guy???)! |
“I might not be the best at Pigskin Footbrawl, but I can spot Elvis with the BEST of ’em 
!”
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